You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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