rhymes with "ouble enetration"
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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