eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize