Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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