you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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