somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Randomize