She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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