My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize