You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize