I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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