I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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