her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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