You're completely useless in the revolution.
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
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