Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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