I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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