I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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