you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tequila makes me forget i have legs
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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