Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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