Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
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