We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
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