you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
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