I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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