clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize