hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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