Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
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