My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
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