So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
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