You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
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he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
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Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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