I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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