I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize