I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
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