We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Sext me about skeletons
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Randomize