If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
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