good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
honey bunches of taint.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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