That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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