your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
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