we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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