i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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