Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize