On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
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