what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
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