you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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