He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
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It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
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Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
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