Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize