that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
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