so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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