The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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