While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize