He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Randomize