I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Damn victory sex feels great
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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