2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
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